Brain Dumping Anew: 15 minutes for the deeper layer

I have until 8.10 to share my thoughts.
Does this message self-destruct by then? No, but perhaps my drive to share and explore will.
For those that read these entries I’m sure you have noticed a lack of activity of late. When I look for reasons as to why I am also looking for common themes, common core questions as my friend Erica would put it that might run in my background.
As a passionate person I search for ways to reach people with message of health and wellness. As a perfectionist I seek to put 100% of my efforts into each task and as a person afraid of failing I see now that I tend to bite off more than I can chew at times. These bites serve to keep me spread too thin to really dive into a task, this saves me from ever failing but not ever really following through on my visions to their full extents.
Fear is the dominating factor in my decisions still, despite my best efforts to rid myself of this concern.
I have a confidence in my body and my ability to listen to and fuel it and am happily confident in my knowledge that I will always be searching for guidance and support to keep it functioning at its best.
I am confident that I can help every client that comes my way improve their health and wellness and increase their potential to reach their goals if they themselves are ready to commit.
But there is still fear and doubt.
I fear that society has so devalued its health that I might not find an audience to help me put food on the table, pay off student debt and move forward to my greater visions.
I fear that I am up against a culture that has less and less faith in its own intuition and healing powers.
I fear that people will see my clients inability to succeed with their goals as a failing in me. I fear our overall lack of responsibility when it comes to our health and wellness and our disregard of our role in both bringing us to this place, and out of it.

These are the thoughts that bounce through my head as I catch myself hunching forward over my keyboard and sensing the stress over success and failure.
These are the thoughts and emotions I will feel, acknowledge and use as fuel. They are evidence that the the next steps will not be easy but that the reward will be substantial. These feelings let me know that I am on the brink of my comfort zone and that the next steps I take will provide amazing returns.

I can do this. I can step towards my dreams. I can.